A New “First” (even after 18+ years of dieting)

This is big people.  I threw perfectly good food away today.  This is just something I DON’T DO… haven’t been ABLE or WILLING to do so ever before… even when I should have to stay on track.
All of which was in the fridge, already opened, so it wasn’t donatable… 2 containers of leftover Chinese white rice, sugary yogurt, cinnamon apple sauce, maraschino cherries, caramel sauce, and a small container of jelly.  Those dying grapefruit on my counter also got the boot.

I also had leftover “shicken flicken” (you wouldn’t know what that was unless you grew up in my household… it is onions and leftover cubes of ham browned in butter mixed with egg noodles) that I had EVERY INTENTION of eating during the daytime hours so hubby wouldn’t have to witness it since he’s trying to stick to the diet as well.  And instead, I DID NOT want it!  So, I froze it.  This was also a big thing for me.
I haven’t been back for more tortilla chips since Monday (remember I was on the fence whether I’d eat them or not?)
I even put away my banana holder since we’re not having those.
I haven’t used my strainer for pasta in over a week.
Things are a changing!

You know what the difference is this time?  I’m not doing it alone.  This is the very first time in my adult life the person I’m living with is doing it too. Since my hubby is too, that means he doesn’t want to have to see these foods we can’t eat in the fridge either and it also means he won’t be eating it, so it probably would have been wasted anyway (though some of those things would have still been fine past his August gastric sleeve surgery, but why not just not go back to that anyway?).

I love this.
I love how I’m feeling.
*I love not doing this alone.*
I am even loving my scale!  The weight I saw this morning is one I haven’t seen since I was 2 weeks postpartum after the huge weight loss of having my baby (the most effortless weight loss EVER) before the breastfeeding hunger took over.  I have been fighting for 8 months to see that again and finally today, I did.

It’s been 5 months since I started my 365/50 Project and several times I got to a certain weight and would be “on track” for 2-3 days (sometimes a week or longer because I was just so far up and had to make my way down again) but just on the cusp of finally getting back to that fleeting postpartum weight and I’d go off the rails, eat whatever I want and stop logging/trying for just one day and poof, the scale shot right back up.  I would therefore feel like a failure, get bummed and take bit before wanting to try again which means I’d put back on more weight and be right back up to where I was.  Rinse, repeat.

I’d keep failing about 1 to 2 days before getting down to that weight almost every time… denying myself the chance to make true progress.
And on that last day of “trying” I’d be struggling… 3 days of logging food and “trying” felt like 2 weeks.
This time?  This is Day 4 on Keto and I don’t feel like I’m struggling at all.
Instead, I’m totally enthused to log my foods so I can figure out my carbs/protein/fats so I can input them into my spreadsheet to see the breakdown on a pie chart to see if I hit the 75% fat, 20% protein & 5% carb goal.
I often do this ahead of time (before I actually eat the food) so if my percentages aren’t quite right, I can play around with amounts (or swap foods) to achieve as close to this goal as possible.  It truly makes me happy to see my pie chart on point.  It is motivating.

Now, with all that said, I’m going to be honest about something that up until this point, I was going to keep to myself.

Today hubby & I will be having ice cream.  One pint each.  This is completely planned. His usual coffee Haagen-Dazs and my usual Ben & Jerry’s Tonight Dough.  We successfully got back down to having this once a week (trust me, hubby would eat a pint EVERY SINGLE night if I let him) and I decided this was the ONE thing we would maintain in our lives so my hubby didn’t completely lose his mind being on a diet for the first time in his life.

Yes, it’s a HUGE carb & sugar hit (not to mention calories).  No, I won’t be able to make my percentages right… trust me, I tried last night ahead of time… no go.  However, as I’ve discovered in the past, sometimes a high calorie burst can help further weight loss.  I can’t tell you how many times I’d be trucking along with good food choices and exercise, but not seeing it translate to the scale, and then I have a pint of ice cream and the next day I’m down 2 lbs.  So, so many times that’s happened!
But my weight loss has been coming along fine, so this will be an experiment.  I’m curious how my body will react.
I also hope we can go right back on track afterwards (not so worried about myself this time, mostly hubby).  I haven’t even wanted chocolate or ice cream since starting Keto.  I don’t even actually feel like it today either… but looking forward to it anyway… still thinking about this ambivalence.

I decided to see what my day would like sans ice cream… man, what a difference.
pie chart comparison 28Apr2017

My protein is higher than it would normally be (on the without ice cream chart – usually 20% or less) because I was intentionally trying to really lower my carbs & fat knowing the big hit the ice cream would be (calorie hit as well… a whopping 1240 calories alone) so this meant lots of eggs today… more than usual.  All the protein helps my body handle the sugar forthcoming.

So there it is… the good, the bad (?) and thankfully, no ugly.  Can’t wait to see how this plays out.  Ooh, and hubby is going to weigh-in sometime this weekend… can’t wait to see how he’s doing!  If not that great, I promise not to gloat about my 6.8 lb loss already (and it hasn’t even been a week). 😉

About gwenacious

Always a person in progress. On a mission of self-improvement and exploring my artistic side.
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2 Responses to A New “First” (even after 18+ years of dieting)

  1. Turns out hubby weighed himself this morning. Good news is that he’s down 11lbs! Bad news is his interpretation of that was something like “I can lose 10 lbs taking a crap”. 😦 He stated how he feels he fluctuates 10 lbs easily and clearly isn’t believing in the results of this new diet. I told him we’ll see what next week brings. He has to keep up with this or he won’t get approved.
    Also, they were out of Tonight Dough, so I had Half-Baked and that saved me over 200 calories.

  2. I’ve heard that having cheat days is an important part of being able to stick to a diet/radical change in nutrition. Enjoy your ice cream!

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